So, if you are a visitor to the shop, you will have noticed that Annie is back on a Thursday.
This means that Jonah and I can have a day off together. We are supposed to do nice things, but we tend to catch up with jobs at home, go to Trade Fairs and other shop related things. We are not good at fun and relaxation.
If you are in York on a Thursday, this is your day to ask for money at Cleggs. Annie is a sucker for a sob story and whatever your disadvantage or charity, she will give you money to ease your suffering. This is due to her kind and friendly disposition, which she inherits from her father. Annie only ever shouts at you if you send indecipherable texts, wear your mascara smudged or tanning cream in streaky lines, or change lanes on roundabouts. Of course , the use of glasses could correct all these faults, but what mother wants to be perfect?
When I am in the shop on a Monday or Wednesday (you have been warned), people ask me “where the lovely man is”. They tell me what a calm and tranquil atmosphere he creates. This is because he doesn’t move much. He actually complained yesterday that I had moved the Sellotape dispenser and he now has to stretch from the tissue paper to the Sellotape dispenser. You will experience his stretching if you actually dare to ask him to wrap something. His wrapping techniques are second to none and you will not ask for this service on a second visit.
He and Annie have christened me “shop Ofsted”. This is due to my being rather particular about shop layout, replenishment of stock, correct labelling, the watering of plants, hoovering of floor, washing of mugs, I could go on. But if I am shop Ofsted, then Jonah is “in special measures”.
Jonah is in all of the other days. Try not to wake him when you visit.